I made a mess. Not just a mess: because I did not learn from my past mistakes, I intensified the mess. I blew it up... And now I'll have to accept the consequences. I know it is going to turn out fine in the end. But until I'm sane again, this originally inconceivable mess is going to take some time to clear up. Some patience, some understanding, some willingness. Eventually, we will mend this.

[removed] ______________________________________________________________________
______________________________________________________________________

[2012]: It was a rough year. It wasn't really full of 'ups and downs'. It would be better described as 'an up which went down'.

"One year ago, around the start of 2012, I received my 'O' Level results which brought me to VJC. Expected to do much better than 8 points but accepted it nevertheless. I knew I worked hard, but I had spent too much time on my notes that I neglected practice to a large extent. Hopes of getting into RI were dashed, so VJC it was then.

Although I ended my VS journey on a good note, I did not start off my year in VS too well. I wanted to make JC a fulfilling experience for myself throughout my entire JC journey, so I continued to do my best in everything and with confidence in myself.

While I had a really great start, interacting well with peers and being self initiated myself, things took a turn when I was overly pressured by the expectations I had to uphold. The level of quality leadership in my fellow ODACers was getting the better of me, and the increasing expectations of Mr Ng wanting me to better myself as a CT rep started to stress me out.

It was just the beginning of my mad experience in JC, when started to not live up to the expectations of being a sufficiently good member of my PW group, even as I was trying my best. Instead of living up to my own expectations, I was trying to live up to the expectations and standards others had of me. I knew I had to continue to be confident in my assigned tasks, but stress was getting the better of me. The fact that I didn't do well for my Mid Years wasn't helping at all.

I had no idea what went wrong with me then, but I managed to turn the stress around and work hard to meet those expectations of others in the mid year. It wasn't healthy, though. While attempting to meet their expectations, I was unable to meet even my own. I started to struggle being the kind of team player I wanted myself to be.

Well there was a classmate who helped enlighten me through inspiring me indirectly, bringing my determination to outperform back up partially.

Okay yes, I guess I ought to talk about this classmate and my friendship with her. So basically Angela and I became very good friends in class. But soon many started to have the impression that councillor Angela and ODACer me were being too close to each other, such that it seemed like we were more than just friends. As the controversy grew, I started to feel uncomfortable with others having such thoughts about us. Cos what's funny is that we have absolutely zero interest and compatibility for each other at all. (Yes, we talked this out with all honesty and openness once before). Truth is, being together will be a torturous nightmare, hence impossible. Definitely certain.

Even so, that did not stop us from becoming close friends: we understood each other really well and, being two extremely different people, we saw that we could learn a lot from each other. Plus we were oh-so-willing to help each other out in times of need. Eventually I realised that there was no point getting uncomfortable with the thoughts that people had about us, because they all don't matter. A guy being close to a female friend certainly does not mean that there's something going on between them, right? Precisely; we weren't doing anything wrong, why bother.

Honestly speaking, by right, our personality types are not supposed to click, so it's pretty surprising that we were able to last as close friends. Then again, we've definitely had a number of arguments. There were even times that one of us may have made things accidentally and unintentionally harder for the other person (e.g. me was irritating, irrelevant, annoyingly hesitant, etc). But it was through mutual trust, sensitivity, tolerance and understanding that has allowed our friendship to stay this strong. I believe that friendships like these are, indeed, very possible.

I've decided to pen this friendship down, because I guess this friendship isn't something I should be shy about. In fact, it's the purest and simplest friendship one could ever ask for. A friendship to be treasured and valued. And that's really all to it.

So anyway, as pure and simple friends who will always stay this way, preparing for Promos became a collaboration between us at the tables outside ODAC room. Which unfortunately gave my fellow ODACers more opportunities to either speculate or poke fun at me... Well good news was that my exam results improved as a result, and though the increments were not substantial, they were sufficient.

While things weren't too bad after all, there were still problems with my leadership positions, affecting my self esteem and confidence much. Sometimes I regained confidence, other time I'll lose it yet again. It was a vicious cycle that was killing me from the inside. I wanted to figure out what exactly was the main cause of these mad cycles that don't seem to end.

Badly.

Then I reflected (sometimes with some company): Did I care about what others think? Erm not really, no. Did I fear rejection? Well honestly, yes. Were expectations of myself too high? I guess so. Blaming myself sometimes for things that I weren't at fault for, and being hard on myself when I was at fault for something. Okay, so I was afraid of being judged or something?

AND THEN I realised:
It's just me.

By trying too hard to meet expectations, I wasn't being myself, I was being somebody else. It's not that I didn't have enough opportunities, it's that I did not fully utilise them to their potential. If I had ignored all negative thoughts, expectations and pressures, things would have been just fine. If I had done my best while accepting my flaws, there would be nothing to regret. If I saw the world as it is than as I am, I would have effectively made things much simpler for myself.

As this realisation came, 2012 drew to a close."

Bringing along these weird lessons of 2012 with me into 2013, I hope to make this year another Year of Marked Improvement (I like to call it YOMI. Haha). I realise that by completely revealing a summary of my thoughts about myself in 2012 I may be judged once again (haha jkjk), but I don't care if I will be or not any longer. It was an integral part of my life, and I'm proud of it.

(It's okay if this post didn't make sense. Reflecting with this post was all I needed :P)

I did my best in 2012. I didn't do my best in 2012. Or whatever. For once I believe in myself, CHANCES are, best or not, I can and will do better next time.

Once 'vicious', now 'virtuous': [2013].

Labels: Goals, School

______________________________________________________________________
______________________________________________________________________

I made a mess. Not just a mess: because I did not learn from my past mistakes, I intensified the mess. I blew it up... And now I'll have to accept the consequences. I know it is going to turn out fine in the end. But until I'm sane again, this originally inconceivable mess is going to take some time to clear up. Some patience, some understanding, some willingness. Eventually, we will mend this.

[removed] ______________________________________________________________________
______________________________________________________________________
[2012]: It was a rough year. It wasn't really full of 'ups and downs'. It would be better described as 'an up which went down'.

"One year ago, around the start of 2012, I received my 'O' Level results which brought me to VJC. Expected to do much better than 8 points but accepted it nevertheless. I knew I worked hard, but I had spent too much time on my notes that I neglected practice to a large extent. Hopes of getting into RI were dashed, so VJC it was then.

Although I ended my VS journey on a good note, I did not start off my year in VS too well. I wanted to make JC a fulfilling experience for myself throughout my entire JC journey, so I continued to do my best in everything and with confidence in myself.

While I had a really great start, interacting well with peers and being self initiated myself, things took a turn when I was overly pressured by the expectations I had to uphold. The level of quality leadership in my fellow ODACers was getting the better of me, and the increasing expectations of Mr Ng wanting me to better myself as a CT rep started to stress me out.

It was just the beginning of my mad experience in JC, when started to not live up to the expectations of being a sufficiently good member of my PW group, even as I was trying my best. Instead of living up to my own expectations, I was trying to live up to the expectations and standards others had of me. I knew I had to continue to be confident in my assigned tasks, but stress was getting the better of me. The fact that I didn't do well for my Mid Years wasn't helping at all.

I had no idea what went wrong with me then, but I managed to turn the stress around and work hard to meet those expectations of others in the mid year. It wasn't healthy, though. While attempting to meet their expectations, I was unable to meet even my own. I started to struggle being the kind of team player I wanted myself to be.

Well there was a classmate who helped enlighten me through inspiring me indirectly, bringing my determination to outperform back up partially.

Okay yes, I guess I ought to talk about this classmate and my friendship with her. So basically Angela and I became very good friends in class. But soon many started to have the impression that councillor Angela and ODACer me were being too close to each other, such that it seemed like we were more than just friends. As the controversy grew, I started to feel uncomfortable with others having such thoughts about us. Cos what's funny is that we have absolutely zero interest and compatibility for each other at all. (Yes, we talked this out with all honesty and openness once before). Truth is, being together will be a torturous nightmare, hence impossible. Definitely certain.

Even so, that did not stop us from becoming close friends: we understood each other really well and, being two extremely different people, we saw that we could learn a lot from each other. Plus we were oh-so-willing to help each other out in times of need. Eventually I realised that there was no point getting uncomfortable with the thoughts that people had about us, because they all don't matter. A guy being close to a female friend certainly does not mean that there's something going on between them, right? Precisely; we weren't doing anything wrong, why bother.

Honestly speaking, by right, our personality types are not supposed to click, so it's pretty surprising that we were able to last as close friends. Then again, we've definitely had a number of arguments. There were even times that one of us may have made things accidentally and unintentionally harder for the other person (e.g. me was irritating, irrelevant, annoyingly hesitant, etc). But it was through mutual trust, sensitivity, tolerance and understanding that has allowed our friendship to stay this strong. I believe that friendships like these are, indeed, very possible.

I've decided to pen this friendship down, because I guess this friendship isn't something I should be shy about. In fact, it's the purest and simplest friendship one could ever ask for. A friendship to be treasured and valued. And that's really all to it.

So anyway, as pure and simple friends who will always stay this way, preparing for Promos became a collaboration between us at the tables outside ODAC room. Which unfortunately gave my fellow ODACers more opportunities to either speculate or poke fun at me... Well good news was that my exam results improved as a result, and though the increments were not substantial, they were sufficient.

While things weren't too bad after all, there were still problems with my leadership positions, affecting my self esteem and confidence much. Sometimes I regained confidence, other time I'll lose it yet again. It was a vicious cycle that was killing me from the inside. I wanted to figure out what exactly was the main cause of these mad cycles that don't seem to end.

Badly.

Then I reflected (sometimes with some company): Did I care about what others think? Erm not really, no. Did I fear rejection? Well honestly, yes. Were expectations of myself too high? I guess so. Blaming myself sometimes for things that I weren't at fault for, and being hard on myself when I was at fault for something. Okay, so I was afraid of being judged or something?

AND THEN I realised:
It's just me.

By trying too hard to meet expectations, I wasn't being myself, I was being somebody else. It's not that I didn't have enough opportunities, it's that I did not fully utilise them to their potential. If I had ignored all negative thoughts, expectations and pressures, things would have been just fine. If I had done my best while accepting my flaws, there would be nothing to regret. If I saw the world as it is than as I am, I would have effectively made things much simpler for myself.

As this realisation came, 2012 drew to a close."

Bringing along these weird lessons of 2012 with me into 2013, I hope to make this year another Year of Marked Improvement (I like to call it YOMI. Haha). I realise that by completely revealing a summary of my thoughts about myself in 2012 I may be judged once again (haha jkjk), but I don't care if I will be or not any longer. It was an integral part of my life, and I'm proud of it.

(It's okay if this post didn't make sense. Reflecting with this post was all I needed :P)

I did my best in 2012. I didn't do my best in 2012. Or whatever. For once I believe in myself, CHANCES are, best or not, I can and will do better next time.

Once 'vicious', now 'virtuous': [2013].

Labels: Goals, School

______________________________________________________________________
______________________________________________________________________

This tab has been specially created to gratefully thank each and every one of my fellow Victorians for shaping the way I have experienced, developed, grown and emerged as a true blue Victorian. I extracted the lists from Facebook, so I didn't really spend so much time on this. So once again, THANK YOU VICTORIA. I am proud to be in the Victorian family..... Our Victorian family. VICTORIA SCHOOL: where oridnary lives are transformed.

In order of date I started to know the group, and then increasing priority for final three-

1. Class 2I 2009:

Aditya Kulkarni
Adli Ihsan Kent
Andy Loke
Anurag Dalvi
Athanasius Koh
Bryan Ong Wen Xi
Daniel Lau
Darius New
Darren Ho Shu Kai
David Lee
Derek Wong
Goh Jun Jie
Hamzah Omar Yaacob
Hui Han Chan
Jing Wen
John Tay
Joshua Benjamin Ho
Jurgen Lee
Justin Goh
Keeve Tan
Lee Jiang
Mohamed Suhair
Muhd Syafie
Nathanael Kyzer Neo
Nicholas Lau
Nicky Phua
Nirmolak Singh Bajaj
Philip Chuah
Ryan Chee
Saravanan Rajendran
Shen Hao
Sherman Lee
Syahid Piyehs
Tan Jian Wen
Theodore Tan
Wang Kai
Yogesh Tulsi
Yong Jie Ng
Zong Ren Ong

2. VS JLs of VELOCI-T 2009:

Abdul Hannan
Ang EmoSad Kang Jie
Bryan Ong Wen Xi
Bryan Yong
Darren Hernandez Tan
Darren Ho Shu Kai
David Lee
Deon Sim
Derek Kaxere Lian
Dev Anand
Douglas Chan
Elrond Choa
Ernest Teh
Eugene Merci Mok
Eugene Tan
Ezra Taliv Mo
Faris Adam
Ganesh Muthupalani
Hariz Hybrid
Haziq Shahrin
Ignatius Tan
Isaac Chia
Iskandar Original
Ivan Ting
Jonah Aw Kailer
Jonathan Hoong
Jonathan Lim
Justin Goh
Khairul Anuar
Lee Jiang
Li Ming Ren
Lim Supeng
Marcus Goh
Marcus Tong
Matthew Chan
Maximillian Chia
Melvin Ng
Ming En Chong
Mohamad Hadi
Muhammad Hafiz
Muhammad Nurhadi Taha
Muhd Afiq
Mustaqim Mohamed
Nicholas Lau
Nicholas Lim
Nur Zhafirin
Nurdin Chittrapark Nashrullah
Preshant Dayan Achuthan
Pua Zhao Chen
Ryan Chee
S Bharath Sp
Sanjeev Menon
Sean Christopher Leo
Terence Yeo
Theodore Tan
Thiyaghessan Poongundranar
Wei Quan
Yee Zong Yew
Yorisan Kho

3. Class 2C 2011:

Arijit Joshi
Benedict Snsdftw Choong
Bharat S. Punjabi
Bryan Tai
Damian Tan
Daniel Ong Wen Tao
Ding Young
Egmont Loh
Gary Ng
Gerrell Chee
Hendrick Lhj
Iliyas Juanda
James Lee
Jared Chiang
Jason Wong
Jerry Lim
Jerry Truffles Yan
Jie Yang
Jordan Tay
Justin Lai
Justin Lie Gyun Yu
Kah Weng
Keith Lau
Khairi Adam
Lim Kai Zhi
Marcus Cheu
Mohamed Haneefa Jamaludeen
Mohamed Hasif
Nawfal Marican
Ng Felix
Ngeow Chee Fong
Patric Ching
Royston Wong
Sean Hö
Shaun Lee
Shee Pish
Shinichi Koh Shenyi
Toh Chin Howe
Wen Jie Lim
Zachary Goh Han Wei
迋偉傑

4. Class 4D 2011:

Åmøs Låw
Bryan Chia
Bryan Ong Wen Xi
Chan Rongsheng Luke
Cheh Yek Teng
Daniel Lock
Daniel Pongy Chin
Darius Iskandar Reduan
Dev Anand
Hansel Konstantin Tantohari
Isaac Chia
Jerry Ng
Jervyz Smileys
Joseph Wong
Kiet Baka Pham
Kiet Pham
Kiran Nico G
Kokul Siddharth
Lai Cheng Yu
Lam Waln
Lie Wen
Lim Zi Yi
Lionel Lim
Low Zhihao
Matthew Lee Tze Ren
Melvin Chua
Melvin Ng
Nguyễn Dũng
Nguyen Thai Hung
Nicholas Lee
Nicholas Nanoduckie Yuen
Pham Thang Loi
Pritesh Kamani
Shabab Chow
Shaun Sim
Thanh Pham Khac
Trần Mạnh Tú
Trần Tiến Đạt
Yue Yao Chong

5. Sec 4 GEOG Class 2011:

Anurag Dalvi
Darren Tan Pei Kun
Goh Jun Jie
Goh Xun Yi
Harri Stinsfire Vishnu
Nikhil Senan
Reuben Moey
Suresh Viswanath

6. Class 2H 2011 from my brother:

Ashley Ho
Azriel Chee
Benjamin Ong
Chua Damien
Eddiemama Kum
Finian Lupus Fzy
Leonard Tay
Lim Yu Jie
Muhammad Danish
Sylvester Siew

7. VS SLs of VELOCI-T 2010:

Bryan Ong Wen Xi
Bryan Yong
Darren Hernandez Tan
David Lee
Dev Anand
Eugene Tan
Ganesh Muthupalani
Isaac Chia
Iskandar Original
Justin Goh
Lee Jiang
Mohamad Hadi
Nur Zhafirin
Preshant Dayan Achuthan
Ryan Chee

8. VS JLs of VELOCI-T 2010:

Abrisam Durrani Mahathir
Andre Orlulu
Benson Choo
Bradley Gan
Brandon Ho
Brandon Nodnarb Tan
Chan Hui Dhar
Darryl Lim
Darryl Sim
Deriik Toh Zhi Jie
Ding Lin Chng
Dion Tan
Dominique Chan
Eric Low Wei Ee
Ervin Dongdong Yap
Firdaus Asri
Frederick Lee
Gabriel Lee
Gerald Loh
Hamizan Ismail
HanChing Yong
Hong Wenyang
Hwy Kim
Ian Kiat Ng
Jerrell Lee
Joel Fun Wei Xuan
Joel Ngiam Kee Yong
Joshua GohMez
Julson Oh
Justin Oh
Kennedy Wong
Kevin Lim
Lee Yao Chen
Lee Zhi Peng
Lloyd Teo
Logesh Waran
Mark Chia
Matthew Cheng
Muhammad Ariff
Nicholas Chicharito
Phng Gary
Praveen Luvsladygaga
Samuel Judah Lim
Sean Teng
Shaun Tian Jun
Stanley Low
Steven Liu Yu
Tan Peng Sheng
Tan Rui Shuen
Teng Wei Hao
Tengku Sharil

Tim Seow
Tin Yat
Wei Jie Dongdong Lee
WeiAn Yoonique
Yilong Wu
ZongSien Ho

9. Random people in VS that I eventually got to know:

Abdul Hakim
Ahmad Hatziq
Ahmad Syafiq
Allelujah Tan Zhen Kai
Benjamin Chua
Billy Moh
Bijaya
Brendan Han
Brian Tan
Casey Tay
Chong Yong Xiang
Christopher Tan
Darren Wong
Daryl Koo
Dhiraj Chainani
Dominic See
Fabian Ang
Francis Neo
Gerome Goh
Glen Loy
Gordon Chua
Heng ZhenHong
Ho Cheng-An
Jacob Wee
Jonathan Ong
Jönathan ت Ang
Joshua Chan XR
Kenneth Kennedicut Chiang
Kian Siang
Loh Ming Jie
Melvin Chua
Mohamed Solihin
Muhammad Syahmi
Nicholas Khor
Oliver Cheok
Pandiyan Pannirselvam
Patrick Seet Wei Han
Ren Jie
Ryen Ho
Shawn Rooney
Siddarth Ramesh
Spencer Phua
Syafiq Tom Nobodyz
Syahrul Syafiq
Tan XianXun
Teo Chin Wei
Terence Phua
Tomus Yong
Wei Zheng
Yilong Wu
Yong Kai
Zac Ravon
Zeren Sun
Zi Xiang Teo

10. BB 2nd Coy Sec 2s:

Benedict Snsdftw Choong
Bryan Tai
Jorim Jireh Sim
Joshua Ong
Joshua Tan Yi Jie
Lester Ye Ge
Lie Yisien
Lim Tzer Shyun
Lim Yu Jie
Lyndon Leow
Sean Lee
Toh Chin Howe
Wen Jie Lim
Zachary Goh Han Wei

11. BB 2nd Coy Sec 3s:

'Soh Jun Hong'
Ajey Ashok
Ben Benji Benjamin Teo
Benjamin Leow
Brandon Ho Jun En
Brandon Ho Wei Zheng
David Mah
Dominique Chan
Jack Ng
Jason Prasad
Justin Koo
Lemuel Lok
Matthias Lim
Noel Chia
Poh Cai Min
Reneesh Norris Reji
Ryan Teo
Shaun Tian Jun

12. BB 2nd Coy Sec 1s:

Lucas Tai
Edmund Wong
Jones Lim
Joseph Tong
Lin Yaohua
Luke Chegne
Roy Chua
Ryan Liverpoolam Jing An
Ryan See
Shih Ern Chiang
Sim Shaun

13. Class 2B 2011 from Sec 2 Camp:

Aleem Siddique
Azri Rostam
Benedict Liew
Cao Bing Quan
Daryl Chan
Desmond Tan
Dexter Loh
Glen Choo
Izzul Amirullah
Jacques Liew
Jonathan Tan
Keith Wo
Lee Yan Cheng
Leo WenZhe
Lim Jing Jie
Oreo Steve
Rui Yang
Shawn Lee Shao Shiong
Wilbert Loh
Wen Qing
Zaki Iscander
Zeph Ng

14. BB 2nd Coy Seniors:

Alwin Low
Primer Benedict Lee from BB YLC 2010
Squad Leader BokChong Tay
Dude Cai Longkuan
Caleb Mah
CSM Casper Chua
Chairman Colin Foong
Squad Leader Daniel Dlee
David Bin
Primer and Chairman Davis Gay
Officer Ernest Koh
Primer Foo Jie Han
Officer Gordon Oei
CSM Ian Ang
Ian Leong
Ian Tan Yen How
Squad Leader Ivan Ng
Officer Jian Ming Kwan
Officer Jiang Wei Benedict Sim
Jonathan Sam
Joseph Ng Zhi Wei
Julian Yap
PT IC Kiang Wen Wei
Officer Marcus Seng
Nathanael Is-Vertically Long
Primer Qian Hao Tham
Activities IC Sebastian Ow
Shawn Lim Shi Xian
Sun Hao Kang
Squad Leader Tan Jek-Kai
Teacher IC Tay Yi Jun Kara
Officer Timothy Cheng
Chairman Timotty Tay
Teacher IC Wuay Boon
Captain Yong Chee Yee

16. JLs I know from Facebook from VELOCI-T 2011:

Amir Zeb
Ang Zhen Yi
Anthony Kwa
Benedict Liew
Brandon Adam
Braxton Sheum
Bryan Tai
Chua Damien
Damian Tan
Dexter Loh
Finian Lupus Fzy
Glen Choo
Hari Aran Krishnan
Iliyas Juanda
Jonas Chow
Jonathan Tan
Joshua Tan Yi Jie
Kenneth Seah
Leo WenZhe
Lie Yisien
Lim Yu Jie
Lyndon Leow
Marcus Lee
Mohamed Haneefa Jamaludeen
Mohamed Mahathir
Muhammad Syakir
Nawfal Marican
Oreo Steve
Patric Ching
Rui Yang
Shadốw-x Rố'y
Shao Qi
Shinichi Koh Shenyi
Sylvester Siew
Timothy Lupus TimoBird
Viknesh Kumar
Zhao Ming

15. BB 2nd Coy NCO Council 2010/11:

Ben Ben Low
Bryan Seah Yun Da
Daniel Ng
Darren Tan Jian Kai
Ernest Teh
Hung Jing Xiang
Joel Lee
Jonas Ho
Jonathan Beibei Bei
Jonathan Lim
Joseph Wong
Joshua Ng
Marc Tan
Maximillian Chia
Nicholas Chan
Rayson Lim Jun Kai
Steven Sing
Theodore Tan
Wesley Ler Yi Xiang
Wind Neo Weihang

17. VS Seniors who have groomed me, directly or indirectly:

SL Adrian Tan
PSB Alexander Tan
SL Amrit Singh Gill Victorian
SL Barry Tee
SL Benjamin Tan
SL Bryan Kwa
HCL Teacher Chen Jingwen
SL Clarence Ma
SL Darius Tan RongDe
LEAD and PHY Teacher Deng Huiru
Teacher of Class 2B 2011 Denny Aw Yong
CHEM Teacher Fel Yeo
CHEM Teacher Gloria Boey
SL Goh Meng Seng Ryan
Old VS Boy Haafiz Abdul Hameed II
SL Jaren Lim
SL Jason Kok
NPCC Jun Yang Lim
PSL Keith Tan
SS and HIST Teacher Khoo Kay Yong
SL Lakshman Muthiah
EM and FORM Teacher Lee David
SL Lee Jia Lok
SL Low Jun Yew
Marshall Tweem
HE Teacher Melissa Lim
Old VS Boy Muhammad Dzafir
PSL Narendra Kumar
GEOG Teacher Raksha Pamnani-Sajnani
LEAD Teacher Randell Siow
My 1st & forgotten best friend, SL Ryan Loy
Temporary Relief Teacher Seth Koh
Old VS Boy Sunny Paradise Sanjay
SL Tan Yuan Rong
EM, AM and BB Teacher Tay Yi Jun Kara
HIST Teacher Thirunavukarasu Thiru
HCL Teacher Virgil Chew
PSL of 2I Yun Sol

18. And last but not least:

Leaving Principal, Eng Teong Low
2005–2011

NIL SINE LABORE

___________________________________________________________________ ^codename LEGACY
___________________________________________________________________
This random codename, 'the Legacy', was actually created by a random friend, Athanasius Koh (VS 2I 2009, 4E 2011), at a random time of mid-October 2009, nearing the Sec 2 end of year exams. He created a Facebook group and then a fan club of this codename. Here's something Derek Wong (VS 2I 2009, 4G 2011) wrote in that fan club...

There was once a boy, an ordinary boy. He studied and studied for years. Every year he studied, and while he did he sang. As he studied, the people around him all grew smarter, his aura of intelligence spread to everyone he met. Everytime he looked at someone, his stone face would ignite the spark of studies into that person. One day, he created a great note, "History Sucks!! (Part 1)", which shot out across the web of the internal net. Everyone that saw it tried to answer it, but no one could give an answer as perfect as his. Approximately a day and 2 hours later, he released yet another note of power, now called "Possible FACTUAL Science Questions.". A stream of energy shot out, once again, throughout the whole web of the internal net and almost everyone in the valley of Victoria's Secondary level of 2 gained the Scientific knowledge of a genius. After another 4 days, he added the final touches in his grand palace, the National Library of Singapore, for 8 whole hours. Together with the help of other muggers, the note evolved to the level of "Finalised Answers to Science Questions.". During the 4 days before he released the answers, he resided in his grand palace and invited a few of his classmates who wanted to follow him to study into the restricted area. With a quiet and cool environment, his classmates benefited, but were still unable to understand how he was so hard working. Was it because he was surrounded by tons and thousands of books in his palace? No one knew. This acts amazed even the likes of Box-Cat and Pootenagen. And the Anax of Awesome, Athanasius Koh, bestowed upon him the title only the greatest of teachers would gain, the title of "The Glorious One". To be continued....

Alright that's all you get to hear about the Legacy. Now let's move on to me.

This is me:


This blog was created for those who know me to understand me better through the feelings and thoughts of the little segments of my life. Things you don't always get to hear from me. NOT for you to get to know me. So in order for you to know just what kind of person I am, you've got to know me personally. For I don't like to describe myself... Anyway.

Having just graduated from Victoria School not long ago and finished up my 'O' levels recently, I'm currently spending my time well during the holidays while awaiting the results come 9-11 Jan 2012. I hope I did well...

In lower secondary, I was any ordinary Victorian. Never the outstanding one in the class nor the CCA (BB). But I was in the outstanding class of VS 1I 2008 and 2I 2009! Well, not for outstanding academics, but outstanding awesomeness. I was never the outspoken one in the school Boys' Brigade company; all I did was to follow instructions and try to enjoy myself in the CCA. The greatest I ever got in lower secondary was becoming a class monitor for one week. It wasn't my effort, though.

The turning point was the end-of-year holidays of Sec 1, when I thought I had to do something about this. We are Victorians, we are something more, right? So I prepared meticulously (not tediously) for my Sec 2 life during the holidays. Not DO, but prepare to DO. And it turned out great! A comparison of my results in Sec 1 and 2 will show that my results brought me from the level position of 231 at the end of Sec 1, to just 13 at the end of Sec 2. This was a major confidence booster for me.

Then I was selected to join this leadership training camp known as VELOCI-T Camp (Victoria Enhanced Leadership and Outdoor Camp Instructor Training Camp). With it came the advancement of my Victorian spirit and leadership opportunities that saw me grow as a leader I have never imagined myself. Eventually I discovered the word that really defined me: LEADER. Something that I still find hard to understand (I never spoke a word in kindergarten for I was too shy.) With opportunities came experience, and with commitment came legacies. So I became:

- Junior Leader (then Redshirt)
- Peer Support Leader
- One of the 5 Redshirts in Class 4D
- Chairman of VS Boys' Brigade Second Company
- Senior Leader

Well, I may not have performed as well as I have expected for both of my preliminary exams, with a very average level position of 171, but I realised that VS was training us for the 'A' levels, not the 'O's. And more importantly, a well-balanced Victorian life of being a Gentleman, Professional and Sportsman is what the school has aimed for each of us to be, not merely academic results. It has always been Our Vision.

Now, how did I start off so slowly, and still do all that? Allow me to humbly tell you why: It's because Victoria School is something more, and she has a magnificent motto.

NIL SINE LABORE.

Learn all the rest right here:

• The Legacy (VS 2I 2009, 4D 2011)
• Nicholas Nanoduckie Yuen (VS 2D 2009, 4D 2011)
• Melvin Ng (VS 2F 2009, 4D 2011)
• Lie Wen (VS 2A 2009, 4D 2011)
• Justin Goh (VS 2I 2009, 4A 2011)
• Athanasius Koh (VS 2I 2009, 4E 2011)
• The Leader Without a Title (VS 2I 2009, 4E 2011)
• Wang Kai (VS 2I 2009, 4F 2011)
• Lee Jiang (VS 2I 2009, 4F 2011)
• Dominic Phua (VS 2I 2009, 4F 2011)
• John Tay (VS 2I 2009, 4F 2011)
• Iskandar Billy Shah (VS 2H 2009, 4G 2011)
• Lim Jun An (VS 2I 2009, 4H 2011)
• Joshua Chan (VS 2C 2009, 4H 2011)
• Keeve Tan (VS 2I 2009, 4I 2011)
• Jonathan Lim (VS 2D 2009, 4J 2011)
• Ernest Teh (VS 2B 2009, 4J 2011)
• Ad'li Ihsan (VS 2I 2009)
• Jonathan Bei (VS 2B 2009, VJC IP)
• Rayson Lim (VS 2D 2009, VJC IP)
• Ng Yong Jie (VS 2I 2009, VJC IP)
• Daniel Lau (VS 2I 2009, TJC IP)
• Ryan Loy (VS 2H 2008, 4E 2010)

• Nicholas Nanoduckie Yuen (VS 2D 2009, 4D 2011)
• Lee Jiang (VS 2I 2009, 4F 2011)
• Ernest Teh (VS 2B 2009, 4J 2011)
• Melvin Ng (VS 2F 2009, 4D 2011)
• Iskandar Billy (VS 2H 2009, 4G 2011)

May 2009 September 2009 October 2009 January 2010 February 2010 December 2011 August 2012 November 2012 January 2013 May 2013

Shadow Of The Day (Linkin Park) Last Train Home (Richard Clayderman/Ryan Star) With You, Friends (Skrillex) Chances (Five For Fighting) Epos (Zedd) Same Mistakes (One Direction) Waiting For The End (Linkin Park) A Thousand Suns (Linkin Park) Bleed It Out (Linkin Park) Whataya Want From Me (Adam Lambert)